"Is it stereo typing to say all midwives have gray hair?"

Approximatly 13 years ago I began my venture into the "birth worlds". I call it a world, largely because those of us who do birth work, live , drink, and eat birth related material and experiances. It is quite difficult to teach another about this who is not a doula, childbirth educator, midwife, or lactation consultant. Heck, I would even put OB nurses in this batch.
When you find yourself passionate about something, it becomes your life. "You are what you love...not what loves you..." Is this not the truth?
So, I am learning how to juggle being a mother, balancing my own study time and work at a nursing home all to boot. I think there is a husband in the mix as well. I am constantly checking in with where I am at in my progression in learning and have to remind myself the sacrafice of enjoying a small town lifestyle and being a mother and wife in regards to how long it is taking to get births under by belt and study with midwives.
I began to observe a trend amoung younger midwives. They were all very balanced and young; They seemed to have alot of traveling under their belts, and had experianced a variety of apprentaships. Everything from Peru to London.
Then the light bulb went off. They did not have all the rest to juggle. They were childless, un-married, and free to the wind to learn and soak it all up no matter what the climate. What was the response though from clients who knew they did not have children and had not actually experiance childbirth? What was the temperature of discussion when her "life" experiance of childbirth was vast and thourough, and yet she had never had the ups and downs of marriage and birth?
Then I looked to the midwives with gray hair. They had raised numerous children and watched them all grow. Assisted them with their own births and marriage counseling. They had forged paths in their own communities and let go of the conferances they SOOOO wanted to attend overseas. They went through the years waiting for the couple of clients who would forgo the hospital birth and give homebirth a try. They struggled with their own spirituality and their place in birth and they watched the grey hairs grow in over time.
Do you know that moment that you hit yourself on the head and realize the answer was right in front of you the whole time? That was the moment that hit me last night as I read about a conferance in San Diego I am creating on going to.
It hit me that I have been blessed with the opportunity to have had a child...and to not have anymore. I have been blessed to have a husband that encourages me to break free of "what I think" the learning will look like. I am blessed to be going into pre-menopause and to understand it is my body's way of encouraging me forward towards my dream and to be ok with not having more children.
I appreciate all the young vibrant energy of midwives who are forging their own way in the birth communities who may not have the "family" knowledge that comes with giving birth and marriage, however they infuse birth with excitment and energy that the others may not have as we juggle another type of life.
I acknowledge the grey haired women who are passing the torch with excitment mixed with tears in their eyes as they watch the new students step up to what will surely be a wild and fullfiling ride along with some new grey hairs.

"Seeking married white compassionate mother"

Compassion. Ok, say that in your head a couple of times over and over. Compassion. What is it to you individually? Is Compassion having understanding? Is it letting things slide off of your back? Is it not being judgemental and do any of us have that one mastered yet.
I have been passionatly striving this week to cultivate compassion for those who may not chose to "see" what I see when it comes to birth and best practices. I often find myself coming right back to me.
I have a guide, and I call her this due to the dislike she has in being called a teacher; so I have this guide and in her reminding me of the reflection we all are of one another, you can not help but go back to yourself with everything.
So, here I am not understanding why clients do not take the herbs they ask me to reccomend. Why the clients say they want a midwife, and yet never seek one out. Why mothers go to a place of instant fear in the face of something unknown instead of seeking out the women they trust to "be in their village"...so on and so forth.
Then, there it is facing me smack dab in the face.....myself. These women are all some reflection and aspect of myself. I am the creator of my reality. I am that, I am.
Do I follow thru with my own regiment of herbs I know I should be taking? Do I seek out the practioners that I know I may benefit from? How many times have I not reached out to the women who I know will guide me and assit me in my journey and yet I do not. I know that for my "guide and dear friend" must have some enormous compassion & patience for me.
Compassion and being in action is the new task at hand this month.
Listen unconditionally. Be with the other person 100%. Have compassion for yourself when your goals are not met. Know that you are exactly where you need to be in your journey and cultivate understanding when you do not neccisarily understand. Take responsibility when IT IS YOURS TO TAKE, let the other person have their own as well.
The doula's credo for the year!

Welcome to "the birthing womb"......

Welcome to the first blog I have ever created...I almost get teary eyed when I sit with the years it has taken me to tackle such a simple task such as creating this blog site. It is really silly, or is it?
Creation is a funny thing. It truly is the moment we chose to "be" something and as I look back at how, when and where I began my journey into the birthing relms, I am continually drawn back to the day on the river outside of Aztec, New Mexico on a fall day with some friends. That was the "creation" day of delving into the mysterious and exciting relm of "being" a birth worker.
I was gazing around the river and going on and on to a friend of "what is my purpose!!!!". As if I did not know, and considering now, all I needed to do was go within myself and ask....I looked down and there was a perfectly round rock shaped like an egg. No I did not decide to become an egg.
It was at that moment I realized my power as a woman, my power as a mother, and the power I felt from being an informed, empowered and educated pregnant woman!
I set forth to obtain my doula certification and ultimatly become a midwife.
I am excited to share in this journey with you as it has been a wild one, confusing at times, and one of the most transformative journeys to day.
Welcome to "the birthing womb" a blog that welcomes discussion of birth, birth education and a mother's perspective of all the up's and down's of the doula and midwifery proffesion whilst simultaniously transforming my own health, my own perceptions of birth, and educating families.
Enjoy the ride of birth....you can "be born" everyday with a new perspective!